Oh look, a big horn. That's why I come up here....NATURE!

As a child, I don't really remember going to the circus a lot. I was satisfied with my fill of specials on tv and the experiences of Navin R. Johnson. But we recently packed up the whole family and went to the Greatest Show on Earth with Barnam and Bailey's something or other at the American Airlines Center.

Let me just start by saying that the Circus is no longer the dirty, poop-smelling day in the sun that it used to be. This was an air-conditioned, arena rock show featuring all of the crazies you can fit into a Taco Bell in Mexico.

We saw Elephants walk around, Tigers...do...something, they really just kinda walked around while a dude in a leotard whipped them, and clowns (not looking like clowns) try to steal the Ringmaster's hat. What? The whole time I'm trying to figure out what the heck I'm watching, and Rylan is trying to turn my T-shirt into a V-neck.

Kya loved it though, and so that's why you go, but wow. The Ringmaster (obviously a failed DJ who moonlights as a failed Broadway star) had a mic the whole time and sounded like Will Ferrell's impression of Robert Goulet.

Also, over in the corner, there was a band playing all the music. So, like I always do for some reason, watched the drummer and I swear, I think he was a robot. I've never seen anyone play drums with such a lack of enthusiasm. It was like with each kick of the bass drum or crash of the cymbal, he died a little inside.

One of the brightest spots of the night though was when the family next to me showed up with a bag of cotton candy and I asked how much it was. They told me it was $12. Twelve dollars!! So I said to them without thinking, "Who the heck is going to buy that?" Ten minutes later, I realized what I had said, but didn't apologize because doing so would only make them think that a bag of air-sugar was worth more than a dollar while the unemployment rate continues to skyrocket. It's like owning a Hummer.

Anyway, overall, seeing the look on Kya's face made everything worth it. Even more so, seeing the look on Kara's face while seeing the look on Kya's face was even better. Meanwhile the look on Rylan's face was "What makes you think I can sleep through this? I will punish your shirt for your stupidity."

I now leave you with a picture of the Circus as we know it.